Quiznos? More like Quiz-HECK-nos!

So, like every other American out there, I am constantly bombarded with hundreds of advertisements every day. Some of them influence me more than others. One of such was a Quiznos commercial. They were advertising their over-foot-long sandwich for $4. I thought to myself, "That's great! Thats $1 less than subway's foot longs, and I typically like the taste of Quiznos' bread better."

So one day I found myself with the need to buy lunch. Naturally, I sought out the nearest Quiznos. So I asked for the $4 sub, and the guy happily complied. He then took out... A BREADSTICK!!!!!!!!! No seriously, it was a bread stick in size. My eyes jumped and my stomach whimpered. I thought to myself, "No, it has to bake up in the oven." So I didn't say anything.

Well, it didn't bake up. All I had was a foot long breadstick, cut in half, with a wee bit of meat on it. I asked for veggies, and the only veggies availble for that sandwich was lettuce and tommatoes. Good enough for me right? Well, for those of you who don't know me, I don't eat veggies, at all, but I can appreciate them on sandwiches. Basically, if I did not see for myself the physical act of putting on the lettuce, I would never have known they were there. They cut it up so fine and put so little on that it looked just like a seasoning. I tried to take a picture of the fiasco, but my phone, losing heart at the sight of such a dismal sandwich, gave up the battery and died. So there I was, stuck with a sandwich that, compared to Subway's $5 foot-longs, was 1/4 the amount of bread, 1/165th the amount of veggies (by weight of volume, its all the same), and slightly less meat. I curse that wretched day I went to Quiznos.

But then again, I guess that's what I get for listening to a talking Sandwich toaster. =/

We found out yesterday that one of my friends from college - and one of the most wonderful people I know - was involved in a car accident. Her husband passed away from it, though their daughter is fine. I wish there was something I could do.. but for now we are keeping them in our prayers. I am grateful for the plan of salvation and the knowledge that families are eternal if sealed. I know that this life is not all there is, and I am so grateful for the hope that gives us in this life.

Fire alarms? WTF?

So, have you ever been in a nice hotel, comfortably asleep when, all of a sudden, the fire alarm goes off and total pandemonium breaks out? Or at least everyone is awake and annoyed? Well guess what? That happened to us last night. Some of you may be thinking, "I didn't know Joe and Lianna were staying in a hotel?" That's just the thing... WE'RE NOT! Our fire alarms decided to go off sporadically last night in our house. Why? I don't know... maybe because they're from the 1980's and it was just them throwing their weight around, reminding us that they are older then us! So, after about the 4th or 5th time of being woken up, I ripped the two in the basement off the ceiling. No more fire alarms in the basement.

Philosophy

Ok, seriously, Philosophy? That is a college course? What a bunch of make-believe crap. Here's an example of what is said in my class:

Teacher: Is the water bottle here?
Joe: Yes
Teacher: If you don't look at it, is it still there?
Joe: Yes.
Teacher: How can you tell? How do you know? You can't see it, so how do you really know its there?
Joe: Well, we are not infants anymore. When we close our eyes, the world doesn't disappear. If you turn away from the water bottle, and I close my eyes, pick up the water bottle, and throw it at the back of your head, it HURTS! Why? Because its real, its there, you're there; Its material... the world is, even if you don't open your eyes.

Of course, this conversation only took place in my mind in response to my teacher's questions... but seriously? People seriously consider the truth of this stuff?

P.S. This is my 100th post on my blog. Happy 100th post to my blog!

What the FREAK!!!!!!!

One way that Satan stops families: NO MATERNITY INSURANCE! Not a SINGLE health care provider covers maternity. NOT A SINGLE ONE! Seriously. I've called several, and before I give them any info, I say, "All I need is maternity," and they all say, without fail, "Oooohhhh. Sorry. We don't offer that in Colorado. Actually, no one does." Great. Guess Lianna and I won't be having kids soon.

Addendum

I love my husband very much, and I'm grateful he's so encouraging. To be accurate though, it is much MUCH easier to land jobs in the massage field than the biotech field. Comparatively, there are at least 10 massage jobs posted to every biotech job on craigslist. The chances of getting an interview with a good resume are also much, much higher.
Once JD finishes his schooling I won't be surprised if places crawled TO him for a chance to interview him. Really, nothing short of divine intervention could have prevented him from an excellent report from the companies he interviewed with. The talents and knowledge and personality he has always have given him effortless ability to blow away every one of his employers - the only factor that has changed is his need to be forced to focus on education, because if he weren't forced to focus, he'd be out overachieving to provide for our family.

What happens when you marry up?

So what happens when your spouse is a million-fold more amazing and wonderful than you? Well, more doors open for them. Let me explain.

Many of you know that for the last year or so, I've been trying to get a job within my field... something science related. I've check craigslist on a daily basis, talked with recruiters, have a fabulous resume, blah blah blah, the whole 9 yards. I must have applied to about 40 job postings on craigslist and other career websites, and I heard back from 1. I had a great interview. I thought it went really well and that I impressed the interviewers... I even did the ENTIRE interview in FRENCH because the lady I was being interviewed by was from Belgium. Anyway, the told me that I was just over qualified and were going to go with someone else. Bah!

Anyway, to demonstrate what happens when you marry up, Lianna just graduated from massage therapy school. After a quick perusal of craigslist job postings, she applied to three jobs, two of which are at chiropractic clinics, and another at a spa. She also interviewed with a medical massage clinic that came to her school and got the job. However, the medical clinic job may not be what exactly she is looking for after all is said and done.

Anyway, the result? Lianna gets not one, not two, but three job interviews from all three job postings she applied to. She has already had two of the interviews, and got called back for a hands-on interview (test your massage skillz) with both of them. So, im 1 for 42, and Lianna is 3 for 3 in terms of craigslist job postings. >:/

Lol, ok, so I'm not annoyed at all, but am very proud of my amazing and near perfect wife who can knock the socks off anyone. She's worked so hard and diligently while at school, both BYU-H and her MT school. She's so wonderful and I love her so much. So, with that said, I guess I'm just gonna have to get used to my wife being so amazing.

So, that's what happens when you marry up. I swear, I gotta be the luckiest man alive. =)