Today

Has it really been 12 years? It feels like far less time has gone by since I heard the early morning news report in the car on the way to seminary. The time: 5:54 am on my dad's car radio is still easily called to mind. I heard a strange report... and went to seminary. I remember feeling confused, and a vague sense of aprehension and concern as I sat through seminary and a full day of school before rushing home to learn more. The weirdness of detached reality as I watched what appeared at first to be a movie... the smoke billowing out of the World Trade Center, and heard the newscaster exclaim "in what looks like an accide- no! the other tower has been hit!" and then watched it over and over as the news channels all covered the same footage as the rest of the story unfolded.
I lost my sense if indestructibility.
My blind faith in the security of America.
My naive belief that because I loved America, so did everyone else.
I gained increased faith in God.
Respect for the armed forces.
The realization that as an ordinary citizen, I must be aware of my surroundings, and actively work for good and to prevent evil.
I learned that life is precious; as a young teenager I was taught that my choices today matter because there might not be tomorrow.
That God inspires us to do small things which have life altering consequences. That He is everywhere, even in an event of catasrophic proportions. He does not prevent the use of agency to do evil, but He does inspire to stay away, leave early, or heal the wounds of heart and soul.
That vengeance leads to vengeance, hate leads to hate, and that the only way to end violence and hatred is to feed hungry bodies, teach hungry souls truth, and enlighten hungry minds with right principles. When people are cared for and know christ-like love the powers of hatred and revenge are abolished.

Tonight, I hope for the strength to teach my daughter how to learn from the past, and make a positive difference in her future world.